Battle Wounds
by spencerreidswife
Summary: Spencer has undeniable feelings for Derek Morgan. Morgan, who is undeniably straight as a ruler. Or is he? Only time will find out.
1. What's Wrong With Morgan?

**Spencer's Point Of View (unless otherwise said most statistics are probably untrue)**

I walked into the BAU as I did every other day, except today I could feel something was off. Everyone was walking slower, a nervous feel in the air. Confused, I walked up to JJ who had a notebook in hand to ask what was going on. "Hey JJ," I began, "is everything okay?" She shook her head tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "Mor-" An empty feeling arrived in my stomach as the beginning of _his_ name fell from her lips.

"Morgan? What's wrong with Morgan? Is he okay? Why wasn't I notified of this?" I began to shake a little bit, scared to hear what was coming next.

"Some guy beat him up in a bar last night. I don't know the full story, he has not told anyone yet but he is in the hospital right now. He is in pretty bad shape, nothing life-threatening he should be home in a day or two." She stared into my eyes, awaiting my response. JJ is the only person who knows of my growing feelings for Derek. I didn't tell her; one day we were at a bar with the rest of the team, she saw the crushed look on my face when he was dancing with multiple girls of every age and race falling all over him. I remember running out with tears slipping from my brown orbs down my face as the crisp, cool Virginia air whipped around my face. Jennifer was there, she comforted me when I really needed it. The blonde female is truly the best friend I could ever have. The situation at hand came back to my mind and all of a sudden I was breaking down. "Spence, shhh calm down. Come here, you don't need to be seen like this." She was right, they already thought I was the weak link here, nobody needs to see my sobbing over my co-worker. My very _straight_ co-worker at that. I was shaking as she led me into Garcia's office.

"Spencer, ohmygod Spencer are you okay? What bitch to I need to slap into the next generation?" I love Penelope, she always knew how to lighten up a situation. "Wait.. He found out didn't he?" I looked up and she saw the despair, love, and brokenness in my expression. I did not even care she probably just figured out my deepest secret, all I cared about was the man in the hospital bed.

"I- I need to see him." I stuttered out.

"I'll take you." The women both offered at the exact same time. JJ laughed, "I guess _we'll take you."_

"Who are you here to see?" The tall, lean Latina asked in a fake voice shuffling through some papers behind the window of the desk. "D- Der- Derek Morgan." I managed to get out, though I was breaking. She immediately looked up and her bored demeanor left her face and it changed into one of care and sympathy. After looking him up on the system she then told me, "Room 313, love." I nodded thankfully as I was buzzed through the big wooded doors that will lead me to the one my heart is craving.

"Oh, my sweet, sweet Chocolate God!" Garcia cried as JJ loudly shushed her saying he was sleeping. She was no quieter than Penelope though. I hovered behind them, quietly observing as I saw him stir from his slumber.

"Hey Baby Girl and JJ." His voice sounds really raspy; too tired too even look past them and see me. If he did he did not acknowledge me though, but why would he with these gorgeous women in front of me? JJ nudged Penelope and they stepped aside revealing me. "H-hi Morgan.." Wow I was doing a lot of stuttering today.

He laughed but then coughed, "Hey Kid. Don't look so scared, I am not in need of Life Support." I grimaced giving him a look-over. "Actually according to statistics Life Support might actually be a good thing to have at any age, adults from 20-35 are more likely to harm themselves than the elderly due to…." I trailed off nervously and JJ rubbed my back. How come I must always embarrass myself? Again Morgan laughed but seeing the unsure look on my face he beckoned me over to his bed. Using the little remote he brought the top of the bed up to a higher angle and I sat on the bottom. "Look I am completely fine. Just a little banged up is all." My face pinked and I looked down. I was faintly aware of the two girls having a hushed conversation a few feet away and as soon as us boys looked over Garcia blurted out, "I have to use the bathroom!" and JJ quickly followed her out. I glared at them and became increasingly became more aware of my placement on the bed by the second.

"Is it just me or are they being weird to you?" The older male looked at me questioningly.

"Uh it's just you. Actually, I have to go I think they need me back at the BAU to give the uh janitors information on how to properly care for the floors in a business type setting so yeah uh bye." I blushed and myself hurried out the door.

"What the _hell_ are you doing out here?" Garcia questioned me when she saw me in the hallway.

"Walking?" I lied.

"You got nervous didn't you?" I blushed and stared at my feet. "But you were doing so well! He was totally moving in on you."

"He was not!" I defended, "He is _straight _Penelope. As straight as a ruler. In fact, I think he is even straighter. Ignore the fact that some rulers are bendable, he is as straight as a wooden ruler. Even if he wasn't, why would he go for me? I'm just a nervous, flustered, unconfident, wreck. I mean…. He calls me kid." My eyes welled up with tears and JJ came and wrapped her arms around me. Garcia came over too and rubbed my back whispering random things into my ear. I just nodded and they released me as we started walking towards the car. As we walked through the parking lot I overheard a happy man talking on the phone. Oh how I wish that was me.

**A/N: Sorry it is sooo short. I just want to see if people like it, the reaction, before I post any more. My second thing is (if people re even reading this) would you like shorter, quicker updates or longer updates where you wait about a week?**


	2. Nothing Is Impossible

**Chapter 2-Spencer's POV**

"Hey Pretty Boy."

I would know that voice anywhere. Could it be? I turned around and there he was. Derek Morgan in the flesh. He has been out of the hospital for a couple days now but because he was in a bar fight the FBI had to reevaluate him to make sure he was still "clean." "Morgan!" I breathed nervously about to go say hi but a certain computer whiz rushed up to hug him before I could even take a step closer. "Hey Baby Girl." He chuckled, giving her a kiss on the head, "Can I talk to you for a minute?" Penelope agreed and I stood there dumbfounded. I walked away shuffling the papers I had in my hand with a frown on my face. I guess my foul mood was obvious because I could barely turn the corner before somebody interrupted my sulking.  
"Hey Reid are you okay?" Emily Prentiss put her hand on my shoulder caringly. If I wasn't so upset I might have smiled at the gesture but unfortunately, I am.  
"Just dandy." I muttered trying to walk away.  
"No, I'm serious." I'm not some fragile little boy- why can't she just leave me alone?  
"Good for you." I pushed past her and shut myself in my office. I threw myself down into my desk chair and put my head in my hands sobbing quietly. My whole life is a mess. I am crushing hard on my _male_ co-worker, I'm pushing everyone away. I'm just lost. It is so hard to resist the urge to use right now.  
"Hey Reid I was told to come down and…"  
I cut the person off in frustration, "Can't _anyone_ just leave me alone for once? Yes, I'm okay. Just fine. Now leave me alone!" I froze as I realized who I just shouted at.  
"I was just bringing you this file… You are one of the only people capable of going over it correctly. Bye." He tossed the paper on my desk and left. I gave it a glance and just completely broke down on my office floor.

I don't know how long I stayed on that floor. All I know is I stopped crying a while ago and the lights are off everywhere. I am drowning in my own misery on my office floor. That's as pathetic as it gets.  
_Bzz. Bzz, bzz._  
What the hell is that noise?  
_Bzz, bzz, bzz.  
_There it is again.  
_Bzz, bzz, bzz.  
_Oh, it's my phone. For a highly intellectual person, sometimes I can be a bit slow.  
Sighing, I lifted myself off my floor groggily and grabbed my phone off the desk. A picture of JJ showed on the screen and I pressed answer. "Hello?" I asked.  
"Spence!" She shouted and I heard her call someone over, "We have been trying to reach you all day! Where are you? Are you okay?"  
"We? I'm at work. Why all the interrogation? Aren't you?"  
"Spence, it is three in the morning." I checked my clock to see that, indeed, it is 3:06 AM.  
"Oh."  
"Penelope and I are coming to get you. Pack up and come outside." The line went dead and I started to pick up all my stuff. I stared at the file Derek brought in earlier and I left it there on the desk proceeding to make my way to the parking lot. I sat on a bench wallowing in self-pity until a car horn honking repeatedly shattered my eardrums. "Get in loser we're going shopping!" Penelope shouted at me.  
"Are we really?" I asked as I entered Esther and sat down.  
"No, Boy Genius, we are not. It's a quote from Mean Girls in all of its glory. You know, for a genius sometimes you really aren't that smart. It is nearly four in the morning." 

"This isn't my house." I said stupidly. Maybe when I am depressed my high intellectual abilities do not work? I might have to conduct a study on this sometime.  
"Obviously," JJ put her two cents in and rolled her eyes, "It's mine. I don't trust you alone right now. We don't want history repeating itself do we?" I frowned, slouching as I got out of the car knowing exactly what she meant. I also know how easy a relapse can be so I stared uncomfortably at my fumbling hands, intertwining and twisting in the way they always do when I, myself, do not know what to do. "Go ahead, make yourself comfortable. Do you have your go-bag?" I nodded and she continued, "Good so you have pajamas. I will go make some tea- and coffee."  
Penelope spoke next, "Hurry up so then you can tell us all about what is going on inside that sweet, smart head of yours."  
I proceeded to the bathroom, completely unprepared for the reaction I probably will get for my feelings. Nobody likes a complainer, after all.

About twenty minutes later we were settled down in the lounge room all nestled up in multiple blankets, the girls drinking tea and I was drinking coffee reminding me of how much an outcast I truly am. "…and everything reminds me of how I am not good enough for anyone. Especially him. Even if I was good enough for him it wouldn't matter because he is _straight _and I am… I am not. I have this huge crush that will never be returned. It showed when he said hi to me and then Penelope came up and grabbed his attention," I continued not even caring and I turned towards her, swallowing once, "he even asked to talk to you alone! I never get that, I may be Pretty Boy but I also am Kid. _You_ are his Baby Girl."  
Garcia's teared up a little and set down her steaming cup of tea. She scooted across the floor to wrap her arms around me before continuing. "It isn't like that at all. We are like siblings, and do you want to know what we talked about?" She didn't even pause for me to answer, "He asked me why we were all acting so weird when we visited him in the hospital, and if you were okay. Morgan is worried about you, we all are. Everyone in this unit loves you Spencer. We just want to make sure you are okay."  
"It's true Spence," JJ added in, "It is scary seeing you like this. You aren't sprouting random facts, and it's just a different atmosphere ever since you have been falling hard for Derek. I also want you to know something: Nothing is impossible. For all you know, he might reciprocate these feelings. Maybe he just doesn't know it. Maybe he is scared. Remember when you first started feeling like this? Remember how scared you were? You fought so hard to hide your blushes, your smiles. I understand that you are overwhelmed, but maybe you should try to calm down and let yourself feel for once. You never know what can happen."

An hour or so later I was curled up in the guest room on the bed thinking about what she said. I think I want to know what can happen. I think I am ready too, I am going to let my guard down a bit. I want to know what can happen.

**I AM SOOO SORRY THIS IS SO LATE. I HAVE HAD AN EMOTIONAL, CRAZY WEEK. THIS IS NOT MY BEST WRITING, AND THIS CHAPTER IS SHIT BUT I PROMISE THE UPDATES WILL BE LONGER, QUICKER, AND BETTER IN THE FUTURE. I JUST REALLY NEED TO GET MY STUFF TOGETHER. Does anyone want to edit my chapters and stuff before I post them? I could really use it, at least until I am back up on my feet and all. **

**Oh and **_**THANK YOU SO MUCH! I love the response this story has been getting. The first day I got it up it had three comments, and some follows. I can't be more happy and thankful. Love you all!**_


	3. Best Get Going

**Pedro:**You must contact Christina Wellington - 813.346.1903

**Pedro:**or JoAnne Glenn 813-346-1900

**Chapter 3 (by the way this takes place at the beginning of season 4 and JJ isn't pregnant)**

I was sitting at my desk when I felt large hands ruffle my newly styled hair. I let JJ and Penelope have their way with it this morning because, well, Derek. I looked up and my eyes met chocolate brown orbs making everything inside of me swoon like a hormonal teenage girl. "Nice hair," Morgan said grinning. _'I swear to God if you start sprouting random facts right now….' _I thought, leaving myself with an empty threat.  
"Thank you," I mumbled pushing the wants of 'that' part of my brain to the back of my mind. Remembering what I decided last night though, I called upon them for encouragement. "You d-don't look too shabby y-yourself." I managed, stuttering over a few of the words but hopefully he wouldn't notice. Now what did that website say to do if you were in a position like this? Wait, I have an eidetic memory, stop procrastinating Spencer and just do it. I subtly leaned forward to 'leave the opportunity for conversation.' I don't know if this is a good idea though, he's an amazing profiler what if he picks up on this… But if so then wouldn't he have noticed my nervous behavior a long time ago? We do have a rule to try not to profile any us…  
"By the way, did you ever look over that report?" He asked me, leaning down putting his hands on my desk.  
"No, uhm, I got really busy yesterday and didn't have a chance." _Please tell me he forgot about my yelling.  
_"Oh. Yeah, you seemed agitated. Are you okay Kid?" _He remembered._ I nodded, unstable from how intensely he was staring at me, unable to speak coherently. "Y-yeah perfect actually, are you? I mean of course you are just never mind."  
He looked confused.  
"Yeah sure you are." I watched him walk away, glance back annoyed, then continue walking. Once he was around the corner I banged my head against my desk. Clearly, I made quite a commotion because two lovely ladies made their way up to me. Note my sarcasm. I love them, don't get me wrong- they are my best friends, but why can't I be left to sit in my despair?  
"What happened?" They chorused, voices laced with concern.  
"I screwed up." I bluntly stated.  
"Alright well maybe you can fix it on the plane, we have a case." JJ said, walking off probably to notify the others. Garcia pulled me up and dragged me to the bullpen where her computers already were set for the presentation. Now all we had to do was sit down and wait. Soon enough, people started filing in and _he _was the last to enter. Not that I was waiting or anything. He came over and whispered something in Garcia's ear, and they started having a hushed conversation. I was curious but unfortunately I couldn't hear even though they were two feet away from me. I probably didn't want to hear anyway, for all I know he is talking about how weird and awkward I am. To be honest all I really have is intelligence, and recently, I've been doubting that. Derek sat down across from me, lounging in his chair but I saw him stealing glances at me at intervals of 25 seconds. Those quick looks ended as JJ started talking.

"Land O' Lakes, Florida. Three girls murdered with their faces and bodies mutilated except they were dressed in nice clothes and make-up done over the mutilation. They were all 17 years old. The first was found about two weeks ago, in the morning, and from autopsy reports it is said she died the night before. And this girl, Alyvia Walker, was reported missing a few days ago. Same age as the others in the same town." JJ explained, showing the pictures on the screen. These poor girls… I frowned as a thought crossed my mind.  
"JJ can I see the dates these girls were abducted, then murdered?" I asked curiously.  
"Uhm sure Spence." She handed me the papers and my eyes were quickly reading over the page noticing the pattern in milliseconds.  
"These girls were abducted the morning the previous was found. They are kept exactly a week, from Saturday morning to Friday night. Looking at this, it seems we have approximately three days to find Alyvia Walker."  
Hotchner spoke the second I finished: _"Then we best get going."_

**A/N: I know this is shit short but I will do my best to upload a super long chapter in a couple days. I felt weird writing past that part becayse it just felt right to end it there you know? I'm really sick and am attempting to write my Daya fanfiction for all my beautiful Lovatics, Gleeks, and Nayaholics out there! If you want to read it, it is on Wattpad and called "Here Comes the Sun" by SpencerReidsWife. Oh and follow me on IG(; fistingwithdemi and spankthosekeys! Love you all kay bye**


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